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During a weekly game at the home for the aged, the bingo caller began choking and then collapsed.

He was rushed to emergency, and went immediately into surgery.
It appeared that 40 years of calling bingo games in smoky halls had finally caught-up with him.
The surgeon successfully removed a mass that was blocking his windpipe.
After waking from the surgery, the caller asked..

We played BINGO lastnight inside the shuttle

How do you make an old lady say 'Fuck'?

How do you make three old ladies all yell profanity at the same time?

My doctor told me I had a Bingo tumor.

TIL the agricultural etymology of the word bingo.

A guy goes to the doctor and gets diagnosed with yellow 158 he is told he has a week to live. His wife asks him what he would like to do. He says he would like to go to the bingo as hes never tried it. His wife says ok darling if thats your wish.

First game he plays he gets house and wins a large sum of money and an entertainment system. Wins house in second game and wins a new car. The next day he visits the bingo again and wins house again and the same the next day. On his next visit he wins again and the speaker asks him up to the microph..

What’s got 99 balls and fucks old ladies?

How do you get nine grandmas to swear?

How do you get FOUR old lady’s to say FUCK ???

I got fired from my Bingo Caller Job..

Apparently 'A meal for two with a hairy view' is not the way you say 69.

I watched the US Presidential Debate last night, but I don't know if it was worth it

If I wanted to watch two old men fighting and screaming at each other, I would have just gone to bingo night at the local nursing home‬.

An elderly woman passes, leaving her life-long husband a lonely widower.

As time goes on, his life begins to unravel as he spirals into a pit of despair. This does not go unnoticed by his adult children, who grasp at any opportunity to cheer him up. Finally, one of them convinces him to grudgingly attend an evening game at the local bingo hall, knowing that he'll be in t..

I like my tumors like I like my bingo numbers..

What is the name of the elderly man that won three bingos in a row?

How can you tell that a Bingo player just isn't into you?

When you call their numbers 5 times in a row and they still don't answer.

Why don't physicists and Bingo players get along?

They disagree on the application and existence of a free space.

When is bingo harmless?

What's the worst part about trying to contact a bingo player?

You have to send them a letter with your number B4 they'll respond.

I started my new job as a bingo caller last night

and halfway through calling the numbers I farted loudly.
My boss immediately came over and whispered in my ear, 'Don't do that again.'
'Sorry,' I said, 'It must be the nerves.'
'Fair enough,' he replied, 'But there was no need to hold the microphone to your arse.'

This is stupid and funny at the same time

How do you get an 80-year-old woman to yell, 'CRAP!'?
You get another 80-year-old woman right next to her to yell, 'Bingo!

A gorgeous nymphomaniac boarded a plane..

A man boarded an aircraft at London's Heathrow Airport for New York, and taking his seat as he settled in, he noticed a very beautiful woman boarding the plane. He realised she was heading straight toward his seat and bingo - she took the seat right beside him.
'Hello', he blurted out, 'Busin..

THAT's how you do it!

So there's a couple that have been happily married for 30 years, except for one thing: the woman has never had an orgasm. So they visit a marriage counselor.
The counselor listens to their tale of woe, and says to the husband, 'Here's what you do. Go to the gym and find a strapping young

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